Gimme some of that old-timey music

I miss going on retreats. I recently came back from a houseboat trip in which we were in a cove completely secluded from the rest of the lake. And yet I'm already looking forward to getting away again.

I want a cabin where I can get away.  I want the cabin to have a large porch, with either a rocking chair or swinging bench on it, and I want to be able to listen to some music that I like to call old-timey backwoods music.  It's got that jangling rhythm—a bit of country, a bit of blues, a bit of rockabilly.  A little upbeat but also slow as a lullaby. Maybe drink some coffee in the morning or some sweet tea in the afternoon while swinging on that bench, with the front door open and the screen door closed, listening to music from the speakers inside the cabin filling the air around my porch.  Or maybe I'd be on a back patio playing a one-on-one board game with a friend, where conversation and music can both be enjoyed simultaneously.

I guess what I'm after is a quaint coffee-shop atmosphere, but set in the woods with friends and chill music. And less Jack Johnson.  I'll save his music for the beach house.

Here's an example playlist:

Marc Broussard	"Home"
The Civil Wars	"Barton Hollow"
Johnny Cash	"God's Gonna Cut You Down"
Black Rebel Motorcycle Club	"Shuffle Your Feet"
Pawnshop Kings	"Make Me Whole"
Richie Havens	"Tombstone Blues"
Dierks Bentley	"Rovin' Gambler"
The Soggy Bottom Boys	"I Am A Man Of Constant Sorrow"
Sara Watkins	"Long Hot Summer Days"
Nickel Creek	"When In Rome"
The Ranch	"Homespun Love"
Mark Lanegan	"Little Sadie"
Samuel L. Jackson	"Just Like A Bird Without A Feather"
Old Crow Medicine Show	"Down Home Girl"
Fistful Of Mercy	"Father's Son"
Led Zeppelin	"Bron-Y-Aur Stomp"

Back in 15 minutes

Where I work, there was a message posted on the intranet (from June 22nd) that said a certain process would not be working for the next five minutes.  It reminded me of the signs at some stores where they post "Be back in 15 minutes" in the windor or on the door.

If you don't mention what time you posted that sign or your intended audience isn't present to see the sign posted, your time frame is bullshit.  You could've posted that sign at 9:00 am to indicate you'd be back at 9:15.  But if I walk up to the sign at 9:13 am and see that sign, I've been misled.  You'll really be back in only two minutes.

I don't understand what's so difficult to identify concrete times. Is there some higher level of accountability implied if set times are defined?

Leisurely drivers

I'll be the first to admit, I'm not the world's safest driver.  I sometimes drive a bit too aggressively. But there's no need to drive 15mph under the speed limit without any good reason (such as construction, a sorority group of bicyclers, etc.).

Usually when I go to work in the morning, I take a main road with two lanes of traffic going each way where most of that stretch has a 50mph speed limit. It seems as if almost every day, I encounter drivers who apparently think the speed limit is between 35-40mph.  It's not a particularly winding road. Most of that route is straight. The speed limit signs are clearly posted. I don't know why drivers feel the need to drive that much under the speed limit, but irritates the dookie outta me.

Shared office bathroom etiquette

Haven’t had a real rant in a while, so back to the purpose of this blog! RANTS!

A law office is now occupying the space in the building next to the office where I work.  The bathrooms are shared between our office, their office and a weekly publication office.  Things seemed fine in the bathroom until the law office associates came around.

The bathroom counters are now dirty with shaved stubble, paper towels are strewn across the floor, and for some reason, they like to leave the door to the entrance propped open.  I've heard from others that several of those law associates use it as a dressing room as well, not behind closed stalls either.

I don't care if they want to use the bathroom to change or whatever, but use the handicap stall that's big enough for a dance floor and clean up after yourselves d-bags! At least wipe the stubble off the counter and at the very least rinse it down the sink. Just because there's a cleaning lady on site doesn't mean you can treat the bathroom with such disregard that you leave a mess all over the sink.  It's so disrespectful! 

And why would you move a trash can from the corner of the bathroom right into the middle of the bathroom, practically blocking one of the urinals?  Oh! And why would you throw paper towels in the urinals as well?!  That doesn't make any sense and even more disgusting and disrespectful to the cleaning lady.

It's like sharing a bathroom with frat boys, but they don't even bring in any hot chicks.

What the?

It’s amazing how a song can evoke (or is it provoke?) emotions. I’m a very emotional guy. Probably comes from being a momma’s boy. It takes a conscious effort to keep my emotions in check and sometimes I lose control. But I hardly cry a real cry. I’ve only cried once since even before my divorce because I seriously wanted to die.

“A Little Bit Stronger” by Sara Evans came up on my iTunes. I decided to look up the lyrics and even tried singing along, but midway through I broke down and cried. What the fuck? I know what emotions I’ve been going through lately, but damn.

I hate when circumstances are out of my control and I know I’m helpless. SO, today I started controlling what I can. I started a diet today, have a plan to workout at least 3 times a week and curb my alcohol consumption. I should have done this six months ago when I set my New Year resolutions, but my focus was laser focused on someone else and I lost touch with working on me. I’m trying to convince myself that this time all of this is for my own health, and I know I will feel that way when I see results. But right now, it’s really just to get the focus away from everything and back to my own well-being, especially mentally and emotionally. Fake it ‘til I make it, right?

I miss…

I don't necessarily miss being married much any more. But I do miss the companionship of someone I care about living with me. Even though it got to a point where I felt like we were roommates more than spouses, at least there were things we still did together and I enjoyed.  It's probably due to the fact that I'm living alone now and know there won't be someone else coming home at some point in the day/night that I can hang out with. And since then, I've only had one "steady" relationship since being divorced, two occasionally intimate friendships, and one heartbreakingly complicated friendship with yet another.  But the moments I've spent with any of them, not just my ex-wife, when it was just me and the other and no one else was around (or at least felt like no one else was), those are the moments I miss so much lately.

I miss cooking dinner for myself and someone else.
I miss being surprised with dinner if I got home from work after she did.
I miss spending time together watching a show I would never watch on my own.
I miss spending time together watching a show we both love to watch.
I miss driving to random places for no reason whatsoever other than to just spend time together driving around.
I miss driving aimlessly for over an hour, even though she fell asleep.
I miss waiting until everyone else left a get-together so we'd be the only ones left, and I could take her home because it meant she was mine for at least a little while.
I miss reading together in bed.
I miss trying new restaurants together, even if the restaurant was part of a gas station and we had to wait so long we went over our hour lunch break.
I miss talking cutesy to each other.
I miss sleeping in the same bed.
I miss cuddling on the couch, in the bed and once in a while, even in the car.
I miss when she straddled me in the car.
I miss make-up sex.
I miss random occurrences of cleaning every nook and cranny of our place at 4 am in the morning like we were a couple of crackheads, but laughing at ourselves because we knew how ridiculous it was.
I miss laughing so hard and loud in a restaurant that other patrons are asking what our discussion is about.
I miss random trips to the beach after work in the middle of the week.
I miss random trips to the beach at night just we could smoke cigarettes and get coffee and donuts.
I miss random walks to concerts in the park.
I miss not having any plans on a Saturday morning, within minutes turning into a random trip up to Lake Arrowhead for the day.
I miss stargazing together.
I miss putting thought into birthday presents for someone I care about.
I miss going to the "OC Marketplace" (aka swap meet) and neither one of us having interest in what the other wanted to look at, but we'd always agree on what produce we'd buy there.
I miss moving her stuff from one apartment to another.
I miss driving 20 minutes or more together just to get pizza.
I miss driving 20 minutes away just so we could sit at a Starbucks that stayed open past 10pm.
I miss showering together.
I miss giving massages.
I miss making playlists for her.
I miss seeing her try on outfits in a boutique.
I miss seeing her naked.
I miss stealing kisses when no one else was looking.
I miss drawing a bubble bath for her and setting candles all around the tub.
I miss spending an entire day at a restaurant from just after opening until closing because the conversation never stopped.
I miss staring at each other in silence, with only an occasional giggle.
I miss feeling loved.