I abhor this day. Almost as much as Valentine’s Day. With the exception of while I was married, I’ve spent only one New Year’s Eve that I can remember with someone special. That was two years ago. Oddly, it was with someone who broke up with her boyfriend the following day and I became the boyfriend of someone else a week later. That was probably one of, if not the, best New Year’s of my life.
Other than that exception, I hate New Year’s Eve. I know it should be about celebrating the new year with friends and even family. But for me it’s a reminder I’m starting a new year alone again. Almost always has been. Being single and wasting my love on someone who’s unavailable, is exacerbating my bitterness today.
If ever I could be drugged enough to maintain an escape from reality for more than 24 hours, today’s that day.
I’m not supposed to drink tonight. My weight loss challenge is only in a couple days and I need to be good for a decent progress check-in. However, I’m so irrationally angry, sad, hurt, bitter, rejected… A bottle of vodka might be my best companion tonight.
No comments:
Post a Comment